Welcome to the Women Who Shine Brightly Series - a group of amazing women who brighten my life and the world.

#6 - Claudya Martinez

How better to celebrate my golden day than with a fellow golden girl. And if you are hearing “Thank you for being a friend” in your head, that’s not terrible. Claudya and I have decades of friendship in our back pocket and I and most thankful. Please allow me to share this fabulous lady and mi amiga.

You have been in the blogging sphere since before me. In fact, you were a great guidance for me as I stepped out into this new world. What drew you to blogging?

I've always been a creative person and for many years, acting is how I expressed my creativity. When I became a mother, although, I still loved acting, I could no longer be available for auditions at a moment's notice or rehearse for plays. I didn't know anything about blogging, but one day I opened my laptop and started a blog called Unknown Mami so that I could continue to be creative but on my own schedule.

Writing under Unknown Mami, why did you choose to write anonymously? How did you come to the decision to start writing under your name?

Again, when I started blogging, I didn't know anything about it. I was afraid that I would be accosted by a bunch of meanies leaving nasty comments, so I decided that anonymous was the way to go. My husband always told me that it was a bad idea to be anonymous. He said, "That's a terrible name. You don't want to be unknown, you want to be known." He was right. Also, a lot of people didn't really understand the name. It was a nod to the Unknown Comic and my logo included a paper bag over my face. I blogged anonymously for three years until a company that I really respected and wanted to work with approached me and said they wanted to collaborate with Claudya and not Unknown Mami. I decided it was time.

I was glad you came out from the bag, too! Though the bag was very cute.

You and I share not only a similar past, we share a past. We were both actresses in San Francisco in the late 90s. In fact, you helped me get my agent - thank you. We worked together at ACT and were friends. I knew Kekoa when he was just the cute new guy.

All that said, we also share a reframing of our lives as motherhood and other factors shifted our career paths. How was that shift for you? How has that shaped your career now? What is your current career path?

It might sound strange, but motherhood liberated me in so many ways. Before becoming a mother, I thought that I absolutely had to succeed as an actor. I was convinced that if I did not "make it" as an actor, I would be miserable and feel like a failure. Then I became a mother and realized that my creativity is not limited to acting. I could have an audience in a different way, that I could express myself in my own words, and that in many ways that brought me so much more pleasure because acting and everything that surrounded it was so full of racist, sexist BS most of the time.

I had the same experience after I found blogging and had another outlet for my creativity. The sense that there was nothing else to define me went away when an entirely higher purpose came with children. I totally feel you with this. 🧡🧡🧡

My transition to motherhood was hard. I felt isolated. I needed to connect with others. I needed to share. I was so desperate to have a creative outlet that I started writing. I never consciously wanted to be a writer, but it turns out that there was a writer inside of me just waiting to string words together. Shortly, after I started blogging, online publications began approaching me to write for them. Currently, I am self-employed and freelance as a writer, content creator, editor, and community moderator.

Lately, you have been using your platforms to share your battle with anxiety and some of the realities of living as a Latina in the US. Has this been a conscious shift? How have you felt about the last couple of years and the use of social media to address social concerns?

My husband reminds me on occasion that when we met, I told him I was a cultural ambassador. (Did not know this — awesome!) That makes me laugh because although self-appointed, I'm very dedicated to my ambassadorship. I've always felt that I can open people's eyes to the beauty of embracing diversity simply by walking into every situation as myself and not trying to hide my cultural background. I am no one's stereotype and I have always used that as a way to challenge others and their way of seeing those they consider to be "other." So, no, it was not a conscious shift, it is the way that I have always been. I am light-skinned and growing up and even as an adult I've been in situations where people have said derogatory things about Mexicans or Latines (using "Latine" - pronounced Latin-eh - on purpose to be gender-neutral) because they assumed I wasn't one, I have always made it a point to speak up and let them know exactly who they are speaking to and how much I love my culture.

As for my mental health issues, it's pretty much a rose by another name. I have had severe anxiety, depression, and PTSD. I am incredibly proud of myself for seeking help and taking care of myself. I want others who have mental health issues to know that they are not alone and that they should not be ashamed. Social media is a great tool for addressing social concerns. It's a great way to share information, your point of view, and to encourage others to educate themselves and take action.

I am so proud of you, too!

Looking forward, what are your long term goals both personally and professionally?

I don't look at goals the same way I used to when I was young. I'm much less specific about them. Let's just say that I am not only open to the possibilities, I am also excited by them. I never expected to get paid to write and I have a feeling that there will be more unexpected wonderfulness in my future.

Anything to add? Any advice to share?

I recently turned 50 this year and if you would have told me when I was 30 that I would be excited to celebrate my 50th birthday, I wouldn't have believed you because I was told by so many that aging sucked. (RIGHT?!?) Aging doesn't suck, it's a privilege. What does suck about getting older is ageism, so let's knock it off with that nonsense already. You don't stop being worthy or valuable because you are older.

How did you meet Traci?

I met Traci in the beautiful city of San Francisco. She was an MFA student at American Conservatory Theatre and I worked at the theatre. We were both actresses at the time. Time passed and she moved away, then we found each other online again via our shared interest in blogging. She is a kindred spirit.

***

My life has blessed me with many people and as the saying goes, some are for a season. In 2000, I might have thought mine had passed with Claudya. I was so wrong. the universe had a much more meaningful summer for us a little later in life. Anyone who knows San Francisco knows that summer comes late but it is glorious. A casual friendship turned into a deep understanding of motherhood, perceived lost dreams, and a new realization of what really matters (including ourselves) really is. I’m honored to call her my friend and to know that miles don’t determine the quality of a relationship, it’s the depth of understanding.

You can find Claudya at byclaudya.com.

Gracias, querido amiga, por ayudarme a celebrar mi 50 cumpleaños.