A Star in My Own Universe

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Missed Cues

A picture is worth a thousand words.

Especially those that show what was missed. Today is mental health day and I have my son's permission to share this message with you.

Teen son and me

What I didn’t see seems so plain to me now…

We've been having a rough time around here lately but we've been working through it together. But there was a time that he was doing it alone. And I didn't know it. I didn't see what was right in front of my eyes. I had a teen boy. I didn't get it.

I missed it and I can't fix that. I can only be here now. We’re talking a lot now. I’m learning what I didn’t see and didn’t hear and he’s learning what I couldn’t see and couldn’t know. They are good talks now but the first talks really hurt.

The early talks were awkward. Then they were very angry. On both sides. I was not mother of the year. Not just then. That’s obvious. But now. I was defensive. How could I have missed so much? Then came the tears. How could I have missed sooooo much? “ I am an awful mom!!!!” Then came the talking. Lots and lots of talking and listening. Things have come a long way in a short time and I am immensely thankful that he is talking.

There is still a long way to go. These problems don’t go away in a snap. They take work. They take time. They take love. They take patience. But first, they take being seen.

Mental health issues don't bleed or need casts so they can go unseen if you don't know what you're looking for. But today, this mom is suggesting that you take a second look. It might be there, right before your eyes.