17 Years Ago...

Seventeen years ago last night, my brother left this world. His presence is missed daily. And it has been dominating my thoughts as of late.When we are older, we often become more careful, less brave. The truth is that I was never all that brave. I could have learned from him. My brother was always brave,  Maybe too brave. He could have learned from me.Often young people are unburdened by the weight of fear. Fear that a child may be left fatherless, fear that a spouse might be widowed. As we age, we create commitments, said and unsaid. These commitments become weights on our feet. They keep us on the ground. While we all want to fly, life requires us to stay below the sun. When we fly too high, we can become  burned like the mythical Icarus.But children do have commitments even if they don't know it. As a mother, I know my children need me to be around for them. But I need them, too. So much. As I watched my children walk away from me to school today,  it hit me like a sucker punch.  I can't imagine the world without them. I need them to be careful even as I need to let them be brave. So I guess like my brother, we can learn from each other.They will teach me to spread my wings and hopefully, I will teach them to not fly too high. Hopefully, we will both soar just high enough.