A Star in My Own Universe

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Love Yourself This Valentine's Day

 valentinesday, loveI have not always been good about loving myself. Being born with a big, red birthmark on my nose began my struggle with my appearance. Add to that gangly spider legs, stringy hair, and almost four years in braces and no, I did not grow up loving what the mirror showed back to me. Long after the birthmark and braces had been removed, I still struggled with feeling beautiful. Well, let's be honest, make that struggle present tense.But it's more than appearance. I have spent many years locked in the bonds of perfectionism. I would freeze in preparing for an audition because I was so sure I wasn't good enough. Moving into social media can overwhelm me in similar ways. I replaced call-backs and bookings with page views and likes. Not a great self-esteem builder.But worst of all, I would judge my job at home. Did I have my kids in enough activities? Or too many? Was my house clean enough? I'm not crafty or a cook so I felt like I was failing my kids on that front and we were stretched thin for money so I had to say no a lot. I felt too strict or too lenient.It was that last struggle, however, that has helped me realize how important finding love for myself is. My children are so amazing to me. I want them to feel that way about themselves. Telling them they're awesome, however, won't do it. Because if there is one thing I have learned as a mom is that actions matter far more words. If I don't live love for myself, love for them won't teach it.

I'm Falling in Love...

So about a year ago, I began a journey to fall in love with myself. It even feels weird to say that. I am not sure why. I am a good friend, a pretty good mom, and as I tell my husband every day, a fabulous wife. Well, most days - haha. I believe in a God that created me. I am surrounded by love. But I found it hard to love myself.It's not come easy or quickly but I am getting there bit by bit. I'm not sure the mirror and I will be ever be friends but I choose to smile at it rather than scowl. With my perfectionism, I have begun giving myself the grace I would give others. And most of all, (and a nod to my adopting friends), I decided to love the mother of my children. If another woman had given me these precious gifts, I would think her wonderful. Well, I am going to love that woman even if she is me.

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Do you share this struggle? Tell me something you love about yourself. Let's celebrate together.

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#Bloggerstalkingabout

This #BloggersTalkingAbout series features amazing bloggers writing from the heart. Continue reading more by following these links. Loving Yourself by Joanne | Loving Yourself This Valentine's Day by Traci | New Routine & New Doctor by Karen | Care For Yourself By Reducing Anxiety & Worry by Karen | Permission To Cry by Brandy | Caring For Myself In My First Trimester by Jenny. If you're a mom/female blogger, join us in our group, Bodacious Bloggers.